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'Private Gillis Lynch reportn for duty SIR !'


'Unprovoked, the toliet paper vacated the roll, chased me down the long hallway and assaulted me'


Prosecution witness:
'I then, forcibly, removed the toilet paper from the mouth of Private Gillis'


'You do the crime, you do the time!'


Gillis' Buddy

If you're on the 'wrong' side of the law,
'America's toughest sheriff'

Maricopa County Sheriff

Joe Arpaio

Sheriff Joe's Tent City Jail

'An experience you will always remember'


Air conditioning, if you own your own fan
Electrical power FREE
Just plug into one of four extension cord receptacles
with three other inmates


Pink underwear FREE
issue with prison uniform


Green balony with canned string beans (heated)

Green hotdogs on national holidays

All food is FREE

No food coloring additives



Sink Water

2006 Team Training Graduation of Gillis and Jumpin Joe Kramer

Lane: 'Gillis, how did you become a guide dog?'  'You're the guy that runs all the toliet paper off the rolls and tries to eat it.'

Gillis: 'Well, Lane, during your career, you porked down gazillions of Kleenexes.'

Lane: 'I'm kool with that!'  Gillis: 'Kool here too!'.  Lane: 'Koool!'.



Fan Mail...

guide dog puppy Gillis

guide dog Gillis

Robert M. Thomas
Academic Professional Faculty Emeritus
Emeritus College
Arizona State University
Tempe, Arizona

Improving lives of people with little or no sight!